Daily Archives: April 4, 2024

The nature of desire

“Desire is a contract that you make with yourself to be unhappy until you get what you want.” – Naval Ravikant (contemporary philosopher and entrepreneur)

The Couplet by Kabir
कामी लज्जा न करै, न महें अहिलाद।
नींद न मांगै सांथरा, भूख न मांगे स्वाद॥

Transliterated
kāmī lajjā na karai, na mēṁ ahilād |
nīnd na māṅgai sāntharā, bhūkh na māṅgē svād॥

Translated
The one driven by desire shuns shame, feels no discomfort |
He doesn’t seek a bed for sleep, nor craves taste when hungry ||

My Understanding
The quote by Naval Ravikant, a contemporary philosopher and entrepreneur, succinctly reflects Kabir’s observations. It speaks to the idea that being led by desires—be it for physical pleasures, comfort, or even necessities—places us in a state of perpetual dissatisfaction. Just like Kabir pointed out that desires make us overlook moral, ethical, or qualitative considerations, Ravikant suggests that desires trap us in unhappiness until they are fulfilled, often disregarding the consequences or sacrifices made along the way. Both thinkers, despite the vast differences in time and context, converge on the wisdom of recognizing and managing our desires to find true contentment.

Resisting the allure of desire in our modern world is a formidable challenge. We’re constantly bombarded with enticing advertisements and social media feeds that insinuate we’re lacking and need more, more. However, there is a beacon of hope! Through my own journey, I’ve discovered a handful of straightforward techniques that can guide you toward genuine satisfaction, not just fleeting pleasure.

First and foremost, let’s delve into the power of mindfulness. It’s akin to pressing the pause button on life. Take a moment to inhale deeply, and truly observe what’s unfolding in the present – the sensation of your feet on the ground, the rhythm of your body as you take a step. It may sound simplistic, but it’s a potent tool to break free from the cycle of incessant craving.

Next, practice gratitude. When you take a minute to appreciate the good things in your life—your cozy bed, a hot cup of coffee, a friend’s laugh—you shift your focus from what you’re missing to what you do have. This little trick can make you feel instantly richer, even if your bank account says otherwise.

Moreover, it’s crucial to establish goals that resonate with your innermost self. Disregard societal norms dictating what you should aspire to – a lavish mansion, a flashy car. Reflect on what truly brings you joy. Perhaps it’s communing with nature, or lending a hand at a local shelter, or mastering a musical instrument. When your aspirations align with your values, they transform into a wellspring of genuine fulfillment, not just fleeting excitement.

Of course, it helps to have healthy habits in place. You know the drill – eat well, move your body, get enough sleep. These might seem obvious, but many ignore them when caught up in desire’s siren song. A little self-care goes a long way in crowding out the space for unhealthy cravings.

Let’s not forget the power of community. We’re social beings. We need a connection to feel whole. Seek out people who lift you up and see you for who you are, not what you have. And don’t underestimate the satisfaction that comes from helping others—it’s a quick way to remember how blessed you are.

Now, here’s the thing – we’re all going to have desires that don’t serve us. That’s just part of being human. The key is learning to be okay with imperfection, even though sometimes we’ll mess up. When you catch yourself chasing after something that’s not making you happy, take a deep breath and ask yourself what you need. It could be a simple thing like a cup of tea or a bigger thing like time alone. Whatever it is, permit yourself to have it, and watch how that shifts your energy.

A little practice, a little focus, and some attention to detail—and suddenly, life is so much more joyous and satisfying!!